Journal 1/29/15

I lie to protect myself from someone getting angry with me. End of story, I use it as an escape because of my cowardice. The truth can hurt both the liar, and the "victim" of the lie. It's all depending on the lie, and the person you're telling it to. The main thing I lie about is homework, because plain out I don't want to do it, so if my parents asked Id say yes, but usually it's a lie.

Journal 1/27/15

What is a "phony"? A phony is similar to a poser, because they're people who try to be something that they are indefinitely not, I remember this one girl, that tried her hardest to be "cool", and slutty, and all she did was loose my friendship, because she couldn't be herself. The sad thing is, I wasn't man enought to tell her that she was being a "phony" or "poser" and I feel I've failed her. It's sad because she still goes around doing this, she's making a fool of herself. And that is what I think Holden is saying, that "phonies" aren't accomplishing anything, that they're only making a fool of themselves.

Preston's List of Needs

1. What kind of time will you need?

2. What oppertunities will you need?

3. Materials, money needed

4. People you need to meet

The reason we are doing this, is to have one of the most important times of your high school years, and even life, now is the time to think: What is the benefit from this project?

Chapter three notes

-chapter three-

-Authors tone and mood connects to the reader.

-three books, all about returning home, going back to your roots

-Stradlater the opposite of Ackley

-Has an older brother bond with Holden.

Journal 1/23/15

I feel that Holden is lying to us, I fel he isn't who he says he is. I think he's caring, and actually likes people, and wants to be in a "phony" family where everyone cares about him, because it sounds like no one does. He's just a kid, who doesn't know his own true feelings in life, and blames his insecurities for it.

Rage-1

I have finally finished chapter one of my coming masterpiece! Please leave a comment and enjoy!

Rage: "A-Archer...! N-no...!!" "Kainzu, I'm sorry..." he picked up his blade, from the ash covered floor, a molten purple flame, surrounded the two, and at its center, a dragon. The two stood on a round platform in the middle of a cavern, above, jagged crystal hung, as the glow from them would fade, then re light. These crystals kept the room surprisingly well lit, all the while, a rift on the bottom of the cavern spun, the mechanism reacting the the glow, beginning to close, the allagan masterpiece folding, and bending at the will of the surrounding Aether. At the mouth of the cave, far far above, an Allagan platform began to rise, sealing the fate of the two. There was no return, no, not until the bane of the dread lord is slain. The beast leapt from the floor, and spread its mechanical wings as it circled the two below, peering down at its new found prey. It let out a monstrous roar, the two in response covered there ears. Suddenly she struck, diving down, nearly hitting the floor beside them a gust of wind, as powerful as an explosion, hurled them towards the flames. "A-Archer...! I... I'm scared..!" He looked up at his older brother, as he coughed from the sudden burst of air. "Kainzu, calm down.. You know what I must do.." "A-archer p-please...!!" The taller man, patted his younger brothers head, ruffling his Miqo'te ears a bit, as a tear fell from his eye, he turned away, and began to walk towards the center of the arena. "Kainzu.." He paused looking back. "May the light of Pharos Sirius, ever guide you." "ARCHER NO!!" He screamed, as he sobbed trying to run towards his brother. "P-please!! You're the only family I have left!!" The dragon, with a thud landed in front of the man. He peered into its eyes, as it began to hover slightly off the ground. He drew his blade, and readied his shield, the dragon, began to conjure a flaming molten ball in its maw. The man began to pray, very quietly, to where only he could here, he struck his sword in the ground, latched his shield on his back. The dragon continued to conjure more and more aetherical flames, until it gathered enough, with it's tail, it quickly pierced through the mans armor, stabbing into his mid section, the tail went so deep, it even dented his shield. A scream cried out, Kainzu watched in horror, as the beast spit it's liquid hell at his once was brother, instantly burning the body to ashes. All that remained was a sword. His sword. Kainzu, tears dripping from his cheeks, began to stand up. "You killed him!" He screamed. "You killed the only family I have left!" He gritted his teeth, and clenched his fist, stepping ever closer. He looked to the blade, watching as it began to transform, bending, shifting, the sleek Allagan metal, began to form a spear. With one hand, he lifted it from the roasted ground, held it in both hands, and gazed at the dragon above. His screeched again, flying back into the air. In return, Kainzu pointed the spear at the circling beast, he held it firm in hand, bending his knees, he held his aim, he glared at the beast as it began to dive towards him. He held the newly formed spear in his hands, as it began to glow a calm blue, the dragon flew at full speed, but he did not move. At the moment her head was directly in front of him, he lunged his spear into the great beasts godly head. It screamed and roared in agony, the two being pushed to the edges of the fire, the Spurs on his boots began to skid, then finally broke off, he held his stance, he had not budged until they finally slid to a final halt. The Queen of Dragons, guardian of the coils, had died. He pulled the bloodied allagan spear from the beasts head, and latched it onto his back. He fell to his knees, and cried. Two men could be heard from a cavern. "Look! We've found them! Inform the commander!" One yelled, "Yessir!" He replied, suddenly Kainzu heard a familiar voice. "Kainzu...! Kainzu! Is that you!" "Ma'am,  please wait until we reach the floor." "W.... Wait.. Where's Archer..." The voice muttered. His vision began to grow blurry, then everything turned black. A a few days passed, and Kainzu awoke above ground, in what looked to be a medic room. He tried to sit up, looking at his arm to notice an IV attached to it, he looked to his left, observing his surroundings, as any Miqo'te would do. He saw int he right corner of the pale room, he saw something that made him cringe, that brought tears straight to his eyes, he even screamed at seeing the sight of it. Doctors rushed in, as well as a familiar voice. "Kainzu! Are you alright?" A man rushed over, with hair as white as snow, a gripped Kainzu's hand. "Talk to me, what's wrong, it's ok.." He pointed weakly at the Allagan spear, in that instant the man yelled to the doctor's "Remove it, immediately!" One of the two ran over taking the spear and rushing out immediately. His breathing slowed, as the male held his hand, he closed his eyes, laying back, then wiped the sweat from his forehead. "Better..?" He asked, looking down upon the bed panicked Miqo'te. He replied with a slow nod, and rested his eyes. "Rest easy.. We'll talk la-" he was cut off by Kainzu. "Take me to her..." He muttered. "You're in no state to move, I'm sorry, but I have to disapprove." He replied without hesitation. Ignoring the medics words he slowly began to stand from his bed. "I... Need... To see her.." He looked up, tears in his eyes, then stepped out of the tall bed, wearing nothing but very light, paper thin robe, only to cover his nakedness beneath. "Kainzu please." The medic stared into the stubborn man's eyes. "At... At least let me help you.." He put one of Kainzu's arms over his shoulder, and began to walk with him out the room. They started down the narrow black metal hall, step by step, they walked, on their way, and doctors that were on duty, stopped, and gave him a salute, he looked at them confused, confused as why they would salute a failure. The two left the hospital, the mechanical doors opening at their footsteps, he looked around, remembering how they recently took down the Garlean stronghold, and began excavation of the Dalamud, and the binding coil, as they called it. It had been a year since they had taken it over, but only a few weeks ago, had they reached the Ragnarok Central Core, and also, where one man fell, in the name of science, and the preservation of Eorzea. "Lieutenant Halone!" He looked over at surrounding men, and woman, some clad in Allagan Armor, some in researcher uniforms. All at once, they put one hand behind their arm, and one over their heart. "A-at ease.." He replied to their salute weakly. "Where is Catherine." "In the Core sir." One replied. "W-why did you call me sir... Why are you all saluting me.. Archer.." He stopped. "A-archer is our leader..."  There was nothing but silence. A soldier walked up with a crate in hand. "Your armor sir.." She set the crate softly on the ground before him, and opened it. "Do you need any assistance..?" "No, I have some strength.." He removed his arm from the man's neck, then took off the robe, he grabbed the underwear in the crate, and weakly put them on, the soldiers holding their pose. He began to put his armor on. The medic only watched, waiting for him to finish. He put on next, his shorts, then grabbed out his armored thigh boots., they were straight black, with blue Aetherical veins in them, and on his heels, bladed spurs. He looked down into the crate, then grabbed out his doublet vest, then slid it on, the gray outline held the pure white in place. Lastly he grabbed his necklace, as well Allagan, with a Aetherical blue gem in the center. He looked back at the group, then began walking towards the lift back into the Ragnarok Central Core. He began to tap buttons on the control panel, as the soldier that had handed him his gear, and the medic followed. He slid the key card in the panel, and the lift began its decent. While the contraption continued downward, he stared at the panel, watching it, remembering that fateful morning. He turned around and looked to the two. "Sorry to be rude, but, what are your names?" He asked, his arms crossed. The medic spoke first. "Sol Animus, Origin, Ul'dah, Race, Miqo'te Seeker of the sun." "And your combat style?" "Darker magic than you'd expect." "And you.." He turned to the woman. "Raz Tyuna, Origin, Gridania, Race, Miqo'te Keeper of the moon. I specialize in the art of Lancing, more specifically, Dragoon" "I guess I should formally introduce myself Eh?" He replied looking towards the two. Kainzu Halone, Origin, Coerthas, Race, Miqo'te Keeper of the moon, and I specialize in duel wielding. I am as well a Dragoon of Ishgard, but they aloud me to learn the art with two blades instead of a lance." The platform continued to lower, until it reached a patch of mirror crystals, he looked at his reflection, his fair skin, his black tail, and black pointed feline ears, he looked at the grey frosted tips of his hair, touching one in his left hand, he looked back at the other two, Sol, having snow white hair, and Raz having pitch black braids, both of the two hand pointed ears, only their tails differed. Raz having a slick, pointed tail, that would sway left to right, and Sol, who had a fluffed white tail, that swayed right to left. His tail, did not move, it stayed calm, resting itself almost. He turned around completely, as the mirror crystals rose above them, and as the platform reached its destination. The three looked down at the battle field, and isolated pillar of land, in the middle of a cavern, the spinning core had now stopped, and a mechanical bridge had been formed, leading towards the center, scientist had already begun studying the Allagan beast, and its surroundings, until it came to a skidding halt at the edge of the platform. The three walked off, and directly to a stone in the middle of the bruised arena, and sitting on there knees next to it, was Catherine. "Archer..." She mumbled lightly, as Kainzu approached the woman. He had light blonde hair, and light blue eyes, she wore a white lab coat, and black thy boots, with of course, a black mini skirt. She began to cry, but quickly wiped her eyes to cover her weakness. "Brother.." He looked down to the woman and the tombstone. "Your brother was a good, honest man... Even though you two had your disputes, and claimed you hated each other, I saw through it. I know you two cared most about each other, it was a bond no one could break.. We were scheduled to be married this month." She stopped. "Good things never last." She muttered standing up. "Give up this serious act Kainzu.." He relaxed his muscles and looked to the woman before him, he couldn't hold back any longer, he instantly burst into tears, running towards her, as she embraced him in a motherly hug, rubbing the back of his head, and scratching behind his ears, his tail swayed sadly, as he wrapped his arms around the woman's waist. "H-he's gone...!" He sobbed. "I'll never get to see him again.... I'll never get to build snow forts, or throw snowballs at each other, or make a pillow fort..." "Kainzu.. It's ok..." "But.." "Shh hun, everything will be fine. As long as we let the light of Pharos Sirius guide us." At that moment, he remembered his brothers last words, and felt relieved. As if his brother was there, hugging the two, a warmth filled the two's hearts, as a small smile formed on their faces. "May the light of Pharos Sirius ever guide you." Archers soft voice rang out in the two's ears, he spoke one last time. "Do not give up, ever, let my death power you, let my Aetherical energy flow through your minds, and bodies. Let the light guide you, follow that light!" A burst of Aetherical matter erupted from the tombstone, making the room glow a bright blue. The two stood up, and dusted off their clothing. "Raz, fetch me my brothers weapon..." He looked to the other woman. "Please." She gave a quick nod, and began back to the lift. "Well then, while we wait, how about we head into the Ragnarok Core?" Catherine spoke up as the lift began to move upwards. "Sure, I'd like to see what that beast was trying to protect." He muttered and began walking towards the new formed mechanical bridge. "I will await her Lt. Halone." Sol saluted, then waited by the lift, waiting for Raz's return. "Let's get going Catherine." he looked up to the taller woman, his ears perked up, a smile formed on his face. "As you wish!" She smiled back, then led the way across the mechanism. 

Catcher Notes~

-Gets to the point. Seems like he barely has friends. It's like he doesn't want any problems, but somehow gets them. Seasoned. Jaded. Doesn't talk to outside people, only people he knows fondly. Troubled child, yet people care. World weary. He sounds like he puts ups front, protects himself, yet cares of others.

-he separates himself, he feels alone.

-insecure

-he described his friend, in a mean-ish way.

-Holden doesn't like weakness/vaunerbility

-Agrees like a normal teen

-got kicked out of another school

-Holden is confused, he doesn't know what's next.

-he doesn't like phoniness, he's a bit hypocritical

Journal 1/20/15

To me, the author is trying to show that the protagonist, is an average everyday teenager. It shows that he doesn't really want to explain himself, or care about what others do, he to me, seems quite alone, someone that doesn't socialize often. Or have friends. Another thing is, his voice in my head, to me, it sounds like a New Yorker, or a city kid, a mix of the two, he sounds relaxed, not to pissed off at anyone or anything. It's tricky to pinpoint something like that in a book, but that is my best guess.

Journal 1/16/15

Ok, so one time, on the game Final Fantasy XIV I joined a heavy raiding guild, that focused on selling people clears through higher level content for gil, the in game currency. So when I was in there, I was able to join their TeamSpeak (A gaming voice chat) during which, I sat there awkwardly, and listening to them, I felt so uncomfortable and just out of place, I left. I eventually found somewhere I felt welcome, and semi wanted, still today I am there, and I appreciate the kindness of the leader, for both lifting my spirits, and reassuring me when I was down, and trusting me, that I can do things with little explanation.

Journal 1/16/15

These songs were not only written by Paul Simon, it was written by the people he worked with in South Africa, he and the group, worked together to create this album. By going back to the roots of music, he created a new genre, and influenced a great amount of people worldwide, showing that there's more to the world. Collaboration is the key thing to Paul Simons goal, to mix, and match, to find some way, to make a new amazing masterpiece. Music, surprisingly can be literature, a big part of this, is that it doesn't have to be good, it can be maybe three sentences, but still be considered literature. What matters most is how you write it, if you include the culture, the feelings, emotions, and artistic view, if the time period you write about, whether it's fictional or fake, literature depends on the writer.

Journal 1/14/15

When I walked into the class, I felt relieved, that I was somewhere that I was safe, that I wouldn't be judged by my dreams, and my ideals. The thing I love most is, even in the beginning when I first walked into the room, and refused to socialize, is that I still felt safe, and I still felt that I could express myself. I'm taking advantage of this, I'm going to make sure my voice is heard, and my big wish, my big dream, is seen the same way I see it. I will not only try to achieve this, but by force.... I have to begin to be social.... It was my New Years resolution, and I'm stuck with it, so now, I have to make myself get out there, and experience how much this class has to offer, and use the resources available to me.